decorahnews.com continues its series of suicide related stories: Brothers and sisters of people who die of suicide

When a young person commits suicide, people tend to focus on the loss experienced by the parents.  But brothers and sisters whose sibling died by suicide often are told to "be strong for the sake of your parents."

Luther College Professor of Communication Studies Kim Powell has studied the sibling survivors of suicide.  Her 2013 research, conducted with Luther student Ashley Matthys, was the first paper written that studied suicide from a communications studies basis.

The two interviewed 45 people living in 25 states and two Canadian provinces about their experiences in the wake of the death by suicide of a brother or sister.  Many of the interview subjects called the discussions "therapeutic"—because up until then, no one had asked them about their experiences.

"Everyone focuses on the parents," notes Powell, saying she even heard of times where the parents were offered counseling—but the brothers and sisters weren't.  Earlier research discovered that teenagers who had a brother or sister died by suicide were seven times more likely to experience major depression in the six months following a suicide than they were from any other form of loss.

Powell's advice?  "Don't bottle it up."  One of the major questions brothers and sisters ask after the death of a sibling is "Why didn't I see it coming on?"  Powell's research showed that those who knew they were not to blame for the suicide were better able to move beyond the initial stages of grief to begin managing their losses.  One person told the researchers she realized that her brother's suicide was the result of a mental illness and not her own actions.

The research also discovered that those brothers and sisters who were left notes by the person who died by suicide were better able to process the loss. 

Powell says she still hears many stereotypes being used about suicide, but our attitudes are changing somewhat.  She is glad her research has contributed to that change—she's been asked to speak at a bereavement conference about her research and has been contacted by other colleagues in the communications studies field.  Powell also notes that there are now on-line support groups specifically for siblings of people who have died by suicide—and she encourages people to use those resources.

Kim Powell